Saturday, December 31, 2011

well, this is the last day of the new year. bummer. the overall note that this year is ending on isn't quite what I had envisioned. oh well.
in a week it will be my brithday. we are running late in actually getting it planned.... any way. if it doesn't turn out that we have six or seven girlfriends over for a slumber party that's ok. cause I'm deathly afraid of that becoming a crowd kinda setting where I end up in the background. :P
anyway. I'm gonna go square dancing tonight... me hopes.
I don't actually have any high hopes for this next year. why I don't know. I mean, it would be awesome if dad got this business going that he wants to buy. It would also be awesome if I really improve in judo and get promoted. that would be epic.
and my birthday.
I'm looking forward to that.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

I"m still here. I haven't died. I just am not in the mood to write. sorry

Monday, December 26, 2011

yesterday was Christmas and it was pretty good. :)
Today is Monday. I got to go snowboarding today. first time I've been invited to go. :) my brother goes with his friends but today I went with mine.
my brother drove his truck up, parked it and bumed rides up. :)
I wrecked pretty bad... my neck and shoulder are fine now but my wrist and back aren't. :P oh well.
that and I came withing a few inches of getting my face run over by another boarder.
yeah, that last run was a wicked bad one. that hurt. bad.
oh, and while I was walking down (at that point I was getting frustrated with the other boarders and with getting stuck, and with falling over) on of the guys crashed into my board and wiped out. :P he came from behind so I don't know if he was playing chicken or wasn't in control.
cutting close to some one because there isn't enough room on the slope is one thing, playing chicken with the girl limping on the side of the path is another. served him right.
thought there were two cool people up there. a dad carrying his son down on his back while snowboarding and the random dude who was watching out for us.
btw, I was the only boarder in my group with four sledders. :) fun.

Sunday, December 25, 2011

me: I know what this is and I hope it's not pink. *few seconds later* yes, it's not pink. *goes to make the sign of the cross for no apparent reason* what the?! I'm not catholic..

Friday, December 23, 2011

Merry Christmas

 I haven't been to happy lately.
With everything that has happened in the past few months. Being found to be a cutter, having to do counciling and stuff. With Christmas Upon us we are expected to have the 'christmas spirit'.
the fact that i'm not happy makes me sadder, especially when I'm expected to be happy and makes me question what Christmas means to me and is Christmas worth meaning anything because a lot of people have lost sight of the true meaning of Christmas? Should I conform to every one's expectations and be happy on Christmas time? Is it worth it?
My answer?
Yes, It's worth it. It's the day we celebrate Baby Jesus. I'm sure Satan would be thrilled if I was all depressed and didn't care about Jesus' birthday. I have to Celebrate it. It's ever so much more worth Celebrating and so much easier to have fun when you don't want to let some one else have it. (like my little brother says, "I really don't want to make these cookies but i'm going to so that no one else gets to lick the bowl")
SO now i'm very happy that it's almost Christmas and can honestly have the "Christmas Spirit" and am excited. Very excited.
As a side note I"m also excited to find out what the present is that my brother got cause it's a family gift so no one knows. So my curiosity is piqued. that and mom and dad are worried if the got me the right gift so that just makes me wonder......

:P hope that makes sense to every one. :D


I was looking at old photos with mom this mourning. I got to see pics of when the bro and I were little. well, he was a little person I was a little baby. He was holding me. mom was all like, "aww and there he is holding his little sister" (the italics were hers not mine) and I was  like, "aww...." he took care of me when he was little, "thinking of my preciousness". so cute.  and then we got a little older and things changed. we'll not get into that now but the point is. We are awesome friends now and he takes good care of me again. We've come full circle. :D. Love my bro.

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

I am almost finished writing chapter two for my story. this could be fun. the sooner I finish chap two I can start chap three. I would say, yup that's how it goes but I was writing and got stuck so I wrote part of the part after where I got stuck and wrote backwards. :P I can do that you know.
I'll be Priscilla gets really tired of finding these in her mail. :P
 I"m happy right now. even though my wrist hurts and the van is stuck outside. i'm happy. why am I happy? I have no idea. but I am. Maybe i'll see if I can call my friend later. cause i'm happy. and I don't always call when i'm happy.
I wish I could go shopping. cause i'm happy.
I am happy in case you didn't get the message. I'm going to write I think. maybe. I should do something fun.
not only am I content but i'm happy. I feel like the grinch. 'what is the deal?"
the hobbit movie trailer is out. I'm so excited. peter jackson posted it on his facebook page.
we were going to go to a friend's house to make cookies but that didn't happen. we got stuck in the snow coming out of the driveway. we didn't have studded tires on the van. so that plan got ditched. We aren't going anywere today.
but i'm having a buddy of mine over tomorrow. I'm happy.
I haven't had counciling in three or four weeks I think. they've just kept getting canceled. I don't see this as a bad thing except that I have a few weeks left to do and I don't know when their coming so it's like a grayish shadow hanging over my.... hmmm..... well i'm not skipping down my path but It's ok right now so... my otherwise mostly silver lined path.
I"m waiting for Christmas to come cause my teacher is coming over. and then i'm waiting for new year's cause i'm going dancing and then i'm waiting for my B-day. :D i'm having friends over again. who wouldn't want friends over for their sweet sixteen?
*sigh*
I"m content.
what's better than contentment? I have no idea.
i'm glad i'm having some one over tomorrow. She'll be here when my parents aren't. Party!!
jk.
but I do have a love/hate with being left home. well... I think my siblings will be here. that's not bad. and for the most part the loving being alone outweighs  the hating it. I"m good.
I haven't cut. but I do wonder what mom would do if I did. O_o that could haunt me till I know. cause there are so many other tools I could use. knives aren't the only thing that could work. until they were taken that was just what I used. so now I don't. but I do wonder what she would do.... not that I'm going to do anything of course.
I am the ghost of christmas future.... I have come to haunt my own blog....
the ghost of christmas future is epic. when I was little he scared me. now he's kinda cool. depending on which version you watch. some are lamer.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

what to write about for a new post.. let me see...
I have this week off from school. :D and next week as well.
It's almost half way through the week till christmas. :D an amazing fact in and of itself.
we watched a Chipmunk Christmas last night. to cute. There's a reason I love alvin. :P
I need to do some sewing today to finish a Christmas gift. :P
tomorrow i'm going to a friend's house to make cookies. I think.
Here is the vid of 'when she cries' by britt nichole.
good song. :D I didn't make it.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

it isn't true... I do cry. when I"m alone, in the bitter watches of the night.
I was told that we might not have bible study on sunday because my friend wants to go to another girls bible study that I don't really want to go to.
My grandma needs surgery on her eyes and I know we need to support her. so, I know this sounds really selfish but we were supposed to go out for coffee ever so often and then once the projects were done go out for breakfast or dinner or something. just me and mom. now, well just be hangin out at home talkin. that's not bad we just do that when ever.
so last night I was feeling rather forgotten again. *sigh*  so I was crying last night at midnight. i'm good though.
alright. who tought the cutesy little five year old how to tear some one's fingers off?
One minute i'm tickling a litte gal and the next she's trying to twist my fingers and break them at the knuckles, did I also mention hyper extending them backwards?
yeah. that hurt. :P I was not expecting her to know how to do that.
her brother was cute too. he snuggled up on my lap to sleep. :D love little kids.
unless they are really little and then I'm like, "hello small child... uh... what do I do with you?" yeah. no idea what to do with small children mostly younger than two.

Saturday, December 17, 2011

the funnest part of coffee filter snowflakes is blow drying the dyed filters. :)
you know, it is actually possible to get hung up in a door like the cartoon characters when they're walking through the door and it closes on their leg/foot and when they try to get out it only closes tighter on them.... yeah, it's possible. I proved it. It is, in fact, possible to get hung up in the door mid-fall.
I was leaning on the door post, holding myself up and my wrist started hurting. It's been hurting for the past few days so nothing new but I let go of the door post and was working on falling to the ground when my foot got hung up cartoon style. Thus interrupting my fall. It was slightly painful but more funny than anything. just laid of the floor laughing. 
the floor needed a hug. that's why I was falling :)

Thursday, December 15, 2011

1. Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?
2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Kings Disoriented Are
3. Dementia --- I Think I'll be Home for Christmas...
4. Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me
5. Manic --- Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and... Trees and..... 
6. Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me
7. Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire
8. Personality Disorder --- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why
9. Attention Deficit Disorder --- Silent night, Holy oooh look at the Froggy - can I have a chocolate, why is France so far away?
10. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder --- Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells...
 
I think I have seven and eight. and ten.... I find this highly funny...
I made chocolate chip cookie dough truffles. I didn't even eat any of the chocolate. what is the deal?!
anyway, I still feel sick enouugh after all the chocolate I already ate. the aneversery Chocolate that my dad baught my mom. she didn't want it so us kids have been eating it. ugh. I also licked the can of sweatened condenesed milk that goes into the truffles. that stuff is so good. and so sickening.  ugh. that stuff tastes really good in coffee.
stayed up talking with mom last night I think it was 11:30 before we went to bed.
now i'm listening to adventures in Odyssey. Interesting that the reason we live would be a something worth dying for. :P
baby Jeeeeesssuuuuussss. :)
I do wonder what it was like for Mary though, cause she was probably really young. like, around my age. :P  and Joseph wasn't the father, I wonder how that made him feel.... O_o
anyway.

it's kinda sad to me when mom can't fix something.... not kinda actually. IS sad when she can't. She told me she's sending me to a coucelor because she doesn't know what to do. She can't fix it this time; and maybe by sending me to some one else they'll be able to find out what's really and make me be reall, cause she just doesn't know what's real.
still trying to figure out the whole 'real' thing. cause I know a lot of things are real. when i'm sad or depressed, that is real. don't try and hide that. i wouldn't do very well anyway. hrm. frustration? yup that's real... when i'm happy and loud and sarcastic and stuff? that's the rough. because at that point i'm not normally feeling anything. it's real I guess. just a differant kind of real. cuase sometimes I'm happy sometimes i'm just.... me. O_o oxymoronic don't you think?
real numb. numb is an interesting feeling. I feel tired right now. numb is interesting. it's like nothingness. and you can fill it with happyness, dorkdom or anyother feeling you really want to feel. one of the more interesting feelings. like a no feeling. a viod. vacuem. I've just run out of ways to describe it.
well that's about all I got to write about. cause surprisingly I am tired. why I don't know. probably due to haveing intense conversations last night.
they make me tired.... :P I. am. shutting. down...... I think. not bad. just a  little tired.  at least steved hasn't come back yet. mom and the little bro got sick with some kind of cold. and I hasn't gotten it yet. surpirse, surprise. My cold's name is steve. He comes around often.
got to go. that chocolate isn't feeling pretty right about now.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

chocolate cvered pretzels in relation to the family

the little sister: makes the most
mom: makes the second most
the little bro: eats them all as he makes them
the bro: makes the neat pretzels
me and dad: we make OCD pretzels.

yeah. I got OCD.
the light switch by the sliding glass door drives me up the wall.

just finished putting together the ginger bread houses with the famileeeee. lets hope tonight I sleep good. that would be really nice. I don't remember last night much. just a few wacko dreams that I can't really recall. slept till about 10:00 this morning. ping!!!!!!!!!!
think I could be sick on sugar glue.... not really it'll just clog together all my insides. :P JK JK.

oh, yeah the other night with the whole blood thing. I stayed awake till three in the morning. thinking about trust and honor. weird.
I though I was trusted when I gave an answer to a straight question. I didn't cut. K? I swear it. I don't volunteer information and I may work my way out of situation but I'm not a liar. If I answer. being doubted irks me. yeah.
But apparently i'm not to be trusted any more?
bummer. the blood question... interesting no?

oh, have you ever tryed to work three negatives into a sentance?

the bro is gonna take jui jitsu. excited. gonna have him teach me stuff. he's a brown belt in judo right now. :P
dad's gonna teach me ti kwon do. he's a black belt.

i'm just a little orange belt.

asking me to make a salad is like asking a vegetarian to make a stake. how do you do it?


if you ever do something that leaves evidence that could point falsely to something else. make sure you don't leave evidence.
in other words.. don't leave pools of your own blood lying around. make sure you clean up after yourself. even if it was pulling toenails off.

i don't drink beer- tim hawkins.


lots of stuff contained in this post

mom had me worried. I though maybe she was rescheduling my coucniling. turns out it was my ortho appointment. I'd rather have the ortho than the shrink.
sorry. but I don't like her very much.
Christmas is around the corner and I"m excited. my friends are coming over on Christmas. My much loved mentor, Mrs. C, and other friends of mine. I'm not sure if there will be any girls my age around but that's ok. I normally hang with the guys in those cases. guys are lots of fun.
oh, and my little bro was telling mom all about my swinging my hips and his conversation with the bro about girls swinging their hips being cute and stuff. they say they can sure tell I'm 16. but I'm only 15. what's with us swinging our hips anyway?
It's fun to listen to the bro tell the little bro that he'll notice girls when he gets older, he's already said, "if I get married" it's all down hill from there.
I'm also trying to win earlier said mentor onto my side of the twinkie argument. Yes my friend is a facebook dictator and I one of his minions. he ordered me to create twinkie minions. so I did. THEN HE STOLE MY TWINKIES AND ALTERED THEIR GENETIC CODE!!! and he taught them to remove their own voice boxes so that they can no longer answer me when I chose to interrogate them.
With the argument going on we haven't actually gotten to the part about creating a black hole or anything, the twinkie squabbling has stalled our plans. as soon as I get the boss to cooperate the twinkies will me attending villainy High. the school for villainous twinkies. or something like that.
I learned all about mushrooms in science class today. I like shrooms.... :)
I get next week off from school. I'm so happy. and Excited. yesh. I am excited.
you know how some horses spook at their own poop? My dad got scared of the Christmas tree one night.
I reorganized my closet. *sigh* what is the deal? I don't normally do all this organizing. I think i'm trying to put off actually cleaning my room and stuff like, making my bed right. It pretty muchly looks like a tornado hit it.
Dear Second law of thermodynamics, (yes, I spelled that right on the first try.  whoot!!) could you please work backwords for once, hit my room with a lighting bolt and clean it up for me?
Ha! I just got called and illiterate fool because I said I would teach awesome villain stuff and he said I must have gone to a second rate school because higher masterminds would have called it mischevious acts of evil. :P
my friend tryed to kill santa. not really. JK.
mom is making gingerbread houses!! I can't wait. I think we are going to do them on sunday. I love putting candy on my house. one of the traditions is to make a reindear head out of pretzels and chocolate. :P and getting together with friends to do it.

Oh, and on sunday we had friends over. we had half and hour till they had to leave but we wanted to play 'clue' so guess what we did. We played it in teams the dads against the younger girls and the older girls. so much fun. the dads won. they had almost all of the room cards while we had the majority of the weapons and two people and the younger girls had a good hand. I taught my friend how to be sneaky and bait the dads. and dad told the other dad not to trust me because I would totally bait him. The dads won and we all had a good time. us girls are going to play the moms in a week or two and see how they do. that will be epic.

Yes. this is a long post. Mostly because I have better things to do with my time but since i'm sitting her on the couch talking to friends on facebook I figure that can wait and I'ld get caught up on blogging. not that I fell behind or anything.
I really should do my writing. oh well. or I could do some sewing. I still have a project to finish.
the bro went shooting today. I got his own AR-15 so he is happy. I think he was going to sight it in. fun. and I think he was going to go trapping or something or getting ready to go trapping later. :P
ah, well. life is amazing.
I should probably end this and do writing. and then maybe later I'll think about cleaning my room and doing history and german and all that other stuff. see ya all around. or not.
haley

Monday, December 12, 2011

I was reading the Alcohol bottle this morning (we keep it in most of the bathrooms) as I brushed my teeth (I like to read don't you know) I had been using it to clean my earrings, (one of the few things I use it for, including cleaning up cuts and infections and stuff).

did you know on the back it says: does not contain, nor is intended as a substitute for grain or ethyl alcohol. Will produce serious gastric disturbances if taken internally.

it stings like crazy for the first little bit after you put it on something. man, it hurts.

btw,
   best Christmas pic I've seen recantly. sorry to all you twilight fans out there but...... I couldn't help it. :)

Saturday, December 10, 2011

I feel like some kind of celebrity or something when I"m sitting or walking around the tournament (in normal clothes( no gi)) and people ask who or if I"m fighting, and that they like my new haircut on me. I didn't fight today. I still can't take my earrings out and I haven't been feeling well. oh well. still makes me feels special when the little girl tells the older boy, "Jared, I know who she is and I don't even know her name!" and high fives me for some of my fights.
I feel special.
two of my old apponants were fighting today. a 'buddy' and the girl I sent to the hospital last time. my buddy hadn't fought her in years she said. she was asking if she was as strong as she remembered, said she was nervous and stuff. I told her she could do it, she beat me... once... a long time ago. That wasn't met with much appreciation. :) oh well.
She did really well. totally slaughtered the girl. since there was only the two of them in their division the refs just let them go and get as many points as they could in 3 mins instead of stopping the match after the first point. It was a slaughter fest. She won both fights with a minimum of three ippons in as many or less minutes. The mercy rule kept her from timing out the clock with more points.
the mercy rule is if you have three points on your apponant then the mach is over or else it becomes worse slaughter.
It was good.
I will go back and fight next time a think, it was good to have a break this tourney though. Really nice not having butterflies the whole day anticipating the fight.

Christmas makes me cry

One of the best songs ever...
with madisa and Mathew West. I love this song. I heard it yesterday and fell in love.

Friday, December 9, 2011

sibling alliances are amazing. because if you want to do something really bad then you can work together and you know they won't tell cause you can point a finger right back at them. :) int insurance :) getting into the butterscotch together is also relationship building. mutual badness.  It could almost be called bribery as well...
I have done history. and science. and German.
I have made a Christmas suggestion.
I have no motivation.
I have zero energy.
:P
ok. i'm good.
I's happy now. sort of. I think I"ll go draw or something. :)

Thursday, December 8, 2011

╬═╬ Don't go down.
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╬═╬Are you listening to me? Don't go!
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╬═╬Hello...? I said don't go.
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╬═╬Stop it! Don't go down.
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╬═╬Okay. If you wanna be like that then go.
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╬═╬You are still headstrong and you aren't listening to me...
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╬═╬I can't talk to you anymore.
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╬═╬You listen to me! ...don't go down there!
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╬═╬Can you please just listen to me ?
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╬═╬You're dumb if you go down there.
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╬═╬Ok I'm not going to tell you again...don't go.
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╬═╬ Oh Common!! PLEASE!!
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╬═╬Are you bored yet?
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╬═╬Last chance ...don't go there..
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Because you didn't want to listen to me, now you have to like this status.
Put this on your page or profile and you wi
ll find out how many stubborn friends you have...
It's getting dark. dark is ok.... I guess.
Mom just jumped on me. Or fell on me depending on how you look at it. Tackled me. utterly unprovoked.
I was being a good child, just laying on the floor; legs crossed arms stretched out by my sides. Quietly, thinking my own thoughts and giving no one grief or cause to be upset or anything. just being my little innocent self.
And WHAT may I ask does she do? she tackles me! For no comprehensible reason!
Well, being me, all I did was turn her over and tickle her.
well... maybe I did do some thing else.... maybe I tickled her feet...... a little bit..... be she deserved that..... and maybe I took her socks too.....

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS, HE LIVED ALL ALONE, IN A ONE BEDROOM HOUSE MADE OF PLASTER AND STONE.

I HAD COME DOWN THE CHIMNEY WITH PRESENTS TO GIVE, AND TO SEE JUST WHO IN THIS HOME DID LIVE.

I LOOKED ALL ABOUT, A STRANGE SIGHT I DID SEE, NO TINSEL, NO PRESENTS, NOT EVEN A TREE.
... ... ...
NO STOCKING BY THE MANTLE, JUST BOOTS FILLED WITH SAND, ON THE WALL HUNG PICTURES OF FAR DISTANT LANDS.

WITH MEDALS AND BADGES, AWARDS OF ALL KINDS, A SOBER THOUGHT CAME THROUGH MY MIND.

FOR THIS HOUSE WAS DIFFERENT, IT WAS DARK AND DREARY, I FOUND THE HOME OF A SOLDIER, ONCE I COULD SEE CLEARLY.

THE SOLDIER LAY SLEEPING, SILENT, ALONE, CURLED UP ON THE FLOOR IN THIS ONE BEDROOM HOME.

THE FACE WAS SO GENTLE, THE ROOM IN SUCH DISORDER, NOT HOW I PICTURED A UNITED STATES SOLDIER.

WAS THIS THE HERO OF WHOM I'D JUST READ? CURLED UP ON A PONCHO, THE FLOOR FOR A BED?

I REALIZED THE FAMILIES THAT I SAW THIS NIGHT, OWED THEIR LIVES TO THESE SOLDIERS WHO WERE WILLING TO FIGHT.

SOON ROUND THE WORLD, THE CHILDREN WOULD PLAY, AND GROWNUPS WOULD CELEBRATE A BRIGHT CHRISTMAS DAY.

THEY ALL ENJOYED FREEDOM EACH MONTH OF THE YEAR, BECAUSE OF THE SOLDIERS, LIKE THE ONE LYING HERE.

I COULDN'T HELP WONDER HOW MANY LAY ALONE, ON A COLD CHRISTMAS EVE IN A LAND FAR FROM HOME.

THE VERY THOUGHT BROUGHT A TEAR TO MY EYE, I DROPPED TO MY KNEES AND STARTED TO CRY.

THE SOLDIER AWAKENED AND I HEARD A ROUGH VOICE, 'SANTA DON'T CRY, THIS LIFE IS MY CHOICE;

I FIGHT FOR FREEDOM, I DON'T ASK FOR MORE, MY LIFE IS MY GOD, MY COUNTRY, MY CORPS.'

THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER AND DRIFTED TO SLEEP, I COULDN'T CONTROL IT, I CONTINUED TO WEEP.

I KEPT WATCH FOR HOURS, SO SILENT AND STILL AND WE BOTH SHIVERED FROM THE COLD NIGHT'S CHILL.

I DIDN'T WANT TO LEAVE ON THAT COLD, DARK, NIGHT, THIS GUARDIAN OF HONOR SO WILLING TO FIGHT.

THEN THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER, WITH A VOICE SOFT AND PURE, WHISPERED, 'CARRY ON SANTA, IT'S CHRISTMAS DAY, ALL IS SECURE.'

ONE LOOK AT MY WATCH, AND I KNEW HE WAS RIGHT. 'MERRY CHRISTMAS MY FRIEND,! AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT.'

This poem was written by a Marine. The following is his request. I think it is reasonable.....

PLEASE. Would you do me the kind favor of sending this to as many people as you can? Christmas will be coming soon and some credit is due to our U.S. service men,women, and Canadian Forces for our being able to celebrate these festivities. Let's try in this small way to pay a tiny bit of what we owe. Make people stop and think of our heroes, living and dead, who sacrificed themselves for us. Please, do your small part to plant this small seed.
*sight* there's a reason I love our military. they are awesome. 
I don't know how sydney and I got on the topic of BF and GFs at judo last night but we did.
she seemed surprised by the fact that I have never had a boyfriend. I'm not but she was. :)
why? because. guys aren't interested in me and i'm too young. 15 is rather young isn't it? I think so.
"I'm sorry. girl, dey is missin out. you're cute and fun, dey is missin out."
thank you sydney for those ...... interesting words... :)
maybe it can from.... oh yeah, I think one of the guys was hanging around us...:P (we both outranked him actually)
couldn't have been from our other conversation.
"tigress! you cried once!..... two summers ago!"
I'll leave it at that.

I"m such a sucker for little kids. there was the cutest little guy running around in his judo top and the cutest green pants. he was maybe three. too cute! He looked like he didn't have a clue what he was supposed to be doing but who can blame him? cute as a button.
and we played sensie says. have you ever played that?
that is the most interesting version of simon says I've ever played because he's actually in a position of authority were if he says it you hop to it.
so he says ok, get some water or ok, new game you're the sensie, you aren't sure what in the world to do.

anywho...
haley

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

HA!! I don't actually have counciling today. MWAhahaha! I. feel. evil. don't ask why i just do. thank you very much.
I am going to enjoy this week. no counciling makes my whole week. just sayin. it's the highlight. :) the silver lining on a bright cloud...
:)
and you know what? I think my bithday is on a sunday! four. more. weeks.
two more of school till christmas break. :p doesn't get any better than this.. *sigh*
It could actually.
with eggnog.
laying on the floor in the dark. with eggnog. that would be the life. just me. all by myself for a little. in the dark with some eggnog, sprawled out on the floor. maybe some Christmas lights... oh wait. there aren't any in my room. oh well.
just silence... OOOOoooooooo... I think I"m on to something. 'xcept there aint no eggnog layin round here. guess i'll have to make sum.
on my facebook page I asked the question:
M&M's or Skittles? vote!
so far, the skittles are winning. what's your vote?

Monday, December 5, 2011

mom should know by now that If I go tearing up stairs for no reason I'm probably implementing a dastardly plan to take over the world or something. in this case I was after the chocolate.
I got a 'B' on my science test. that's really good for me i guess.
I'm behind in science.
I loath science.
well I Think there is counciling tomorrow and I really don't want to go. I hope this will be over soon. we were talking about it being over around the time my friends cam home and they will be home soon. I really don't want to do any more of this.
I totally forgot what I was doing. but you know what? that is ok with me. I should go find something to do though.
being on a book ban hasn't helped running much. See, I'm allowed to read on the treadmill... lots of fun, so I"m reading the 'spanish brothers' right now. slow starting. Anyway, the running became more of a 'walking' cause I want to read the putrid book but can't any other time.. on average I can read two chapters of slowishness in about 18 minutes. I'm hoping it will pick up the pace soon. I read faster when it's not slow...

my wardrobe :) and the candy I found.

so, I stayed up till around 11:00 last night cleaning out my dresser and closet, organizing stuff (I actually organized everything my color... I impress myself sometimes. I'm not that organized.) and pulling stuff out to get rid of. I was looking at the number and colors of the shirts I have and came to an interesting discovery... I have more blue shirts than black shirts and blue isn't even my favorite color. :P
I have about five black shirts to six or seven blue.
I do not have a single T-shirt that isn't graphic.
even the few polo shirts that I have almost all have emblems or something...
thing is when it comes to t-shirts I have more black than blue but when it comes to button up shirts I have more blue than black. :P
pulled out a size large shirt from out of my closet and tried it on.... I'm a small/medium. way to big... and it was brown strips. I like the style and stuff but brown doesn't do much for me... makes me look... pale. and dead...
can't wear yellow ether. that's one color that's noticeably missing. :P
sooo.
actually I'm not supposed to get any more black... sad. I wanted to get a black hat. black goes with everything.
I happen to like black jeans better than blue jeans.... you can wear anything with them.

I still haven't finished cleaning up.

I found candy in my drawers though. hard candies so they're still good. though I think the 'life savers' are probably two years old. not real sure on that one. I know that candy-cane was from Christmas last year. the tootsy pop? I have no idea...

Sunday, December 4, 2011

blessings in desguise.

this is wrong on every level. the frozen waist-land of the abominable snowman shouldn't be raining in December.

anyway. Mom was teaching me a lessen about blessings in disguise yesterday. I never really liked the fact that friends kept coming in and out of my life or or leaving me after I "got real" with them. Mom was telling me that if that hadn't happened, if I had had such great friends here (Priscilla is awesome but she isn't here anymore) to run to then I wouldn't have the relationship I now have with my brother that will last a life time.
I really appreciate my bro. he lets me come and sit on the floor in the middle of his room and hang out even when I don't have anything to say, he takes me places, does stuff with me and is generally my all around confidant and emotional support.
even if he does beat me up every single time we fight (judo or goofing off). *sigh*
I never would have had that If I had a ton of people to go to.
Priscilla and Saby are amazing and I love them. They are probably the two people outside my family that I go to. I miss them. *sniff*
I talked to Saby last night, I hadn't told her about what I had done. She already knew though 'cause she had been on here. gotta love my stalker friends.
I need to call 'cilla at some point. can't say when...

anyway, the point was blessings in disguise. Things that seem bad aren't always all bad, we just don't always see the good in it.

Friday, December 2, 2011

I went to judo last night. It was good. and odd. I was having a hard time, I was tired and dizzy through out the night which made it hard for me to keep my balance. That was rather an interesting experience staggering around trying to reorient myself.
what's interesting is it was actually one of my better nights there.
I admit that when I'm feeling top notch i don't really care about stuff. I would really rather not pull the mat or shrimp. I would rather not do the step ins and stuff. I would rather not got to all the effert of fighting over and over again. (though I wouldn't quite judo, I love it as much as I dislike it).
but last night i did everything. I normally do it but last night I tryed to concentrate on doing things right.
I didn't have the energy to muscle through it.  hahaha.
I beat all of my aponants which isn't unusual (I don't usually fight mirnda, kaity or the bigger brown belts. )
so the result of not feeling my best was better technique. normally I end up doing footsweeps or valley drops but I actually got the oportunity to exicute my most favoritest throw last night.  awesome sauce. when I got out of that match one of the boys was like, "I want to fight her next!" so I went with him. threw him too.  had one of the boys teased about not wanting to go with me cause he'd get his tail whiped. :P
I'm happy. ecen though in the middle of the match my legs buckled and I went down on my own I still won. :)

Thursday, December 1, 2011

my brother just gave me a bloody lip. contrary to popular opinion I was not trying to bite anybody. He hit me with his hand. :) I was trying to tackle me and I was trying to sit up and we collided. I was not goofing off actually....
I also ran into him yesterday. such a blond. I went past him and patted his shoulder as a went past and then he moved and I ran into him and bounced off.
so now my lip is bigger than it's been in a while. not that I mind....
he then proceeded to give me a nuggee. I told him to stop, he'd already given me a bloody lip. I didn't need a bloody head. and then I thought about all the possible meanings of that phrase.....
we have judo tonight. hurrah.
I have school to do now. bummer.
there's coffee ready. yay.